Letting go of toxic relationships can feel like one of the hardest things to do, especially when it involves people you care about, like family. But let me tell you, cutting ties with toxic people can also be one of the most freeing and empowering things you’ll ever do.
I’ve been there. I had family members who, for years, tried to make me feel small—even though I’ve achieved so much in my life. At first, I couldn’t understand why they were acting this way. Why would people who are supposed to love me try to put me down?
My Turning Point
It wasn’t until I stumbled upon some YouTube videos about toxic relationships that it all started to click. Those videos explained something I hadn’t thought about: their hurtful comments and dismissive behaviour weren’t about me. It was about them. They hadn’t accomplished much in life, and their insecurities were spilling over as negativity toward me.
Once I saw things clearly, it hit me like a ton of bricks. Their words didn’t define me—they were a reflection of their own issues. That realization gave me the courage to finally draw a line and say, “No more.”
What Happened After I Let Go
When I made the decision to cut those family members out of my life, everything changed. It wasn’t easy, and it didn’t happen overnight, but the more distance I created, the more I felt like me. I started to thrive—achieving even more than I thought possible because I wasn’t carrying the emotional weight of their negativity anymore.
Sometimes, you don’t realize how heavy something is until you set it down. Letting go of toxic people cleared up so much mental space for things that actually mattered.
How to Spot a Toxic Relationship
Before you can let go, you need to recognize the signs. Toxic people often:
* Constantly criticize or belittle you.
* Make everything about themselves.
* Downplay your achievements.
* Drain your energy with drama or negativity
* Refuse to take accountability for their actions.
Sound familiar? If so, it might be time to rethink those relationships.
Steps to Letting Go
Here’s what worked for me when I decided to let go of toxic relationships:
1. Understand It’s Not About You
This was the game-changer for me. Toxic behaviour often comes from a place of insecurity. When someone sees you achieving things they haven’t, it can trigger feelings of jealousy or inadequacy. It’s not an excuse for their behaviour, but understanding this can help you stop taking their actions personally.
2. Set Boundaries
Start small by limiting how much time you spend with them or what you share about your life. For me, it meant stopping those long phone calls where they’d sneak in little jabs at my accomplishments. Instead, I focused on spending time with people who uplifted me.
3. Have the Hard Conversations (If You Can)
If you feel it’s worth it, try having an honest conversation. Something like, “I’ve noticed that when I share my achievements, you don’t seem happy for me. It hurts, and I want to understand why.” If they’re open to change, great. But if not, don’t feel guilty about taking the next step.
4. Walk Away
Sometimes, you have to completely cut ties. This is especially true if the relationship is damaging your mental health. It might feel harsh at first, but you’re not doing it to punish them—you’re doing it to protect yourself.
I won’t sugar coat it; walking away is hard. But trust me, you’ll thank yourself later when you feel lighter and more in control of your life.
5. Fill the Space with Positivity
Once you’ve created distance, focus on what makes you happy and fulfilled. For me, that meant diving into my goals and surrounding myself with supportive people. I also leaned on self-help books, uplifting content, and practices like gratitude to rebuild my confidence.
Solutions for Thriving After Letting Go
Letting go is just the first step. Here’s how you can thrive once the toxic energy is out of your life:
1. Surround Yourself with Supportive People
Spend time with those who celebrate your wins and encourage your growth. Whether it’s friends, mentors, or even an online community, positive connections are priceless.
2. Work on Your Self-Worth
Toxic relationships can mess with your confidence. Take time to rebuild it. Journaling, therapy, or even daily affirmations can help you remember your value.
3. Set Goals and Go Big
Once I let go of those toxic family members, I achieved so much more in life. Without their negativity holding me back, I felt unstoppable. Use this new space in your life to focus on your dreams.
4. Forgive (for Yourself)
This one is tricky, but it’s worth it. Forgiveness doesn’t mean letting them back into your life—it means letting go of the anger so you can move on. Remember, forgiveness is for you, not them.
Final Thoughts
Letting go of toxic relationships isn’t about being mean or selfish—it’s about choosing peace, growth, and happiness. You deserve relationships that lift you up, not drag you down.
If you’re struggling with toxic people in your life, remember this: You don’t owe anyone access to your energy if they’re not treating you with respect. Letting go might be hard, but it’s also the ultimate act of self-love. And trust me, once you make space for better things, your life will change in ways you never thought.
